Mama: Play that song with Nelly, where he is in a burning house. Me: Hot in here? *turns on the song* Mama: Yes. *starts clapping** Me: Mama, I need you to understand that song is not about a burning house. Mama: So hot . Hot in here. *claps* Me:

Mama: Shan, me and you, are like, like two birds and a pea. Me: We are what? Mama: Like two birds and a pea. Me: No Mama, you got birds of a feather and peas in a pod mixed up. Mama: Ok, we are like two pods of peas. Me: No Mama. Mama: *huffs and puffs* Well, we close. *turns head*

It was a typical day. My job wanted to coordinate a team builder outside of work since we very seldom hung out. We ended up getting tickets to a Rockets game. The seats were so far up, any row higher we would have seen Jesus and his 12 Disciples. I kept forgetting I wasn't on a roller coaster, that's how high up we were. Luckily, I was able to invite my best friend due to the last minute call out from our manager. I was super excited since I worked with mostly guys, it was going to be nice to have another woman around. I was also happy my manager wasn't coming, she was faker than press on nails. I picked my best friend up on the way to the game; She wanted to get amped up on our way there. I was playing my typical playlist, and she suggested we listened to her music. As soon as she plugged in her phone, the song "Modern Slavery" came on. I probably should have mentioned that my beautiful best friend is Caucasian :). As I was driving, I turned and looked at her ...

Cycling is a great way to get into shape. Whether it is indoor or outdoor, it is a fantastic way to know right off the bat, that your fat ass shouldn't have had Olive Garden's unlimited Pasta bowl the day before. A friend of mine suggested that we cycle together a few days out of the week. I was all for it because I needed a gym partner that could hold me accountable and make sure I was showing up to the classes. I was super excited and decided to go to Dicks Sporting Goods to shop around and get some of the clothing I would need for the class. They recommend moisture-wicking clothing or cycling clothes. I made my way to the cycling section and noticed that they had cycling shoes for sale along with their bike shorts. I quickly found my size, and something told me to just go ahead and try them on before I made that purchase. Bike shorts are an excellent choice for cycling because they have a cushion in the crotch area made to sit on top of the bike. Unfortunately, when I pu...

Everyone knows the saying, "Do unto others, as you would like them to do unto you." Or "What goes around comes back around." You might believe in God, or you might believe in Karma. You might even believe in both. I am a firm believer in getting back what you put out into this world. I have always sowed my seed in church, to my friends and by taking care of both of my parents, and now just my mother. Rest In Peace Daddy. The majority of my expenses have always gone towards food because my parents wanted fast food a lot. My parents were older and were both retired and disabled. It was my duty, to occasionally run errands and grab them bites to eat around my working schedule. Since they were on a fixed income, I always found myself never getting reimbursement for the money I spent. It wasn’t their fault, and If I had to do it all over again, I would. There have been many circumstances where I had fallen short on cash, and miraculously still managed a way to get ...

I have a 64-year-old mother who isn't tech savvy. Surprise Surprise.  I really wish that they could simplify technology for the older folks out there. The remote control is way too advanced for them. 79 different buttons for them to try and read and then they call you multiple times while you're at work trying to figure out how to "turn the damn tv on." So I pitched an Idea to a cable company on how they should simplify the guide for our older generation so they could no longer be weary and have some type of independence when it was time for them to find "Family Feud." Whenever my mother learns technology, she gets super excited. My dad used to be the same way. Once you taught them something over a hundred times, they would finally remember how to do it. And as long as you wrote it down, highlighted it and circled it six times they could never really forget how to do the steps on their own. Then you would save it in your notes, where you put that note...

Me: *Walks through the front door* Mama: Let's go eat at Cracker Barrell, I will pay for our food. Me: Alright, let's go. *Gets in car, starts to back out* Me: Okay, so you're paying? (I ask to Confirm) Mama: No, I said I would Pray for our food. Me: *Starts driving back to the house.* Mama: No you right, OK OK, I pay. She is always scheming to get over on me. LOL